So a different take on Asshole of the Week, just a fucking chance for me to fucking vent about someone really annoying. As many of you fucking know, I take a lot of fucking trains. Pretty much every day I am on a train at some point. I like trains way more than fucking driving. It’s easier, more fucking relaxing, cheaper – plus, there’s plenty of chickish eye candy for me to check out.
But fucking trains aren’t all goddamn fun and games. Not by a long fucking shot. Why back when, I think Romi might have fucking nominated the first Asshole of the Week – some fucking train-riding loudmouth she had to fucking put up with.
Well guess the fuck what? I had the same fucking problem myself this week. It was the fucking worst. I was on the fucking train and this giant fucking shehemoth waddles on board. Now just being fucking supersized isn’t by itself enough to get this coveted fucking prize, not by a fucking long shot.
The thing is, this cow had something else going for her: she was deaf. Now not being able to fucking hear probably has some upside. The problem today though was that this chick kept fucking talking to people. And just because she can’t hear me didn’t mean I couldn’t fucking hear her. Nope, she was fucking bellowing away in fucking deaf-speak so the whole goddamn car could hear everything she was TRYING to fucking say.
Of course no one could understand a fucking word of it.
So congratulations giant deaf fat lady who wouldn’t shut the fuck up on the train this morning, you’re an asshole and you’re this week’s Asshole of the Week. But please, no fucking acceptance speech.
oohhh man that sucks…she should’ve written stuff down, or only be allowed to communicate silently to people who know sign language, you know?
Train assholes are the worst!
Comment by romi41 — January 21, 2008 @ 12:12 pm |
Dude, there was a guy similar to this the other day on my subway home. This disgustingly obese monster of a man with one of those button shirts that are too small so they pull away from the skin so I can see hair poking through. Yark. Yark yark yark yark yark. And the on top of being an eyesore this jackass turns out to be a bonafide nutjob as well! He took up TWO seats (and we all know how much I *LOVE* that) and proceeded to ramble loudly to no one in particular. You know what? Pick one. Seriously, just pick one. You can be a fat fucking bastard who makes everyone want to puke, or you can be a nutjob who makes the entire train wonder if they’re going to make it home alive or at least incident-free. PICK ONE. Not both. That’s too much negative stimulus for my poor brain after a work day.
Comment by greenmetropolis — January 21, 2008 @ 4:56 pm |
@ Romi – i should carry a fucking sheet of paper with me to give to motherfuckers like this – tell them, “You’re fucking deaf, live with it. If you have something to fucking say write it the fuck down.”
@ Greenie – I’m with you. Every asshole can have one mutant fucking power: being fat is one, being a dick is another. But being a loud fat dick just isn’t fucking OK.
Comment by nahole — January 21, 2008 @ 7:31 pm |